Microwave Cooking: Scrambled Eggs, Bacon, Cinnamon Honey Biscuits

[1987]

What need for an oven when one has a wood-paneled microwave? Throw away that outdated appliance! Embrace the future of microwave cookery. Excelsior!

Dang, their plate is tiny.




NOTE: Every single step in these recipes has a corresponding instructional picture. These I have omitted. As with all the recipes on my blog, if you are confused at any point, let me know and I will help you out. However, if you need help with these particular recipes, I will feel sad. I'm not saying you can't still ask, I'm just saying that you will break my heart. Do what you think is right.

Scrambled Eggs, Family Style
Makes 3-4 servings

You Need:
6 eggs
2 tablespoons of margarine
1/2 cup (79 ml) of milk
1/2 cup (50 g) of your favorite cheese, shredded

Get out: [Right now. Run! Run!]
2-quart (2 L) casserole dish
Wire whisk or large fork
Wax paper

1. Break 6 eggs into a 2-quart (2 L) glass casserole dish.
2. Mix in 2 tablespoons of margarine and 1/3 cup (79 ml) of milk
3. Whisk all the ingredients together well or stir them briskly with a large fork.
4. Cover the casserole dish with wax paper.
5. Microwave on MEDIUM HIGH for 6 to 8 minutes. Stir the mixture every 2 minutes.
6. Mix in 1/2 cup (50 g) of your favorite shredded cheese.

Bacon
Makes 1-2 servings

You Need:
4 strips of bacon

Get Out:
Oblong glass baking dish
3 to 4 white paper towels
Fork
Serving plate

1. Place two paper towels on an oblong glass baking dish
2. Arrange four strips of bacon on the towels.
3. Cover the bacon with one paper towel.
4. Microwave on High for 2 1/2 minutes or until the bacon is crisp.
5. Place one paper towel on a serving plate. Remove the bacon from the glass dish with a fork. Place the bacon on the plate.




Cinnamon Honey Biscuits
Makes 8 rolls

You Need:
8 refrigerator buttermilk biscuits
1/4 cup (60 ml) of honey
1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon
1/4 cup (25 g) of crushed nuts
Margarine

Get Out:
9-inch (23 cm) glass pie plate
White paper towel
Measuring cup
Small mixing bowl
Measuring spoons
Wax paper

1. Spread some margarine on the bottom of a pie plate. [With a butter knife, in the picture. This seems futile.]
2. Place 8 buttermilk biscuits in the pie plate. Cover the pie plate with a white paper towel.
3. Microwave on MEDIUM HIGH for 3 minutes.
4. Mix together 1/4 cup (60 ml) of honey and 1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon in a small mixing bowl.
5. When the biscuits have cooked, remove them from the oven.
6. Drizzle the honey mixture over the biscuits. Sprinkle 1/4 cup (25 g) of crushed nuts over them.
7. Cover the pie plate with wax paper and return it to the oven for 3 minutes on MEDIUM HIGH.

Verdict:

Scrambled Eggs, Family Style: As you can see in the picture, these are anemic and in no way scrambled. The key is to cover them with cheese so you can see neither of these facts. My microwave is probably more powerful than a 1987 microwave though, so that could be why they didn't have time to get scrambled. Husband thought they were good, and said they were better than army eggs. I was flattered momentarily, before realizing that I had hit a point wherein I was pleased that food I had made was a notch above military mess hall.

Bacon: This bacon recipe is strangely similar to Rachael Ray's recipe for Late Night Bacon. A more suspicious-minded person might accuse Ms. Ray of plagiarism. Hmmmmmmm.

Cinnamon Honey Biscuits: You can cook biscuits in the microwave, who knew? Can you cook them well? No. No you can't. A few minutes after leaving the microwave, they hardened into rocks. I gnawed off about half of one, then licked the honey sauce off the bottom before chucking it.

All together: Maybe you shouldn't throw away your oven just yet. There are some things, many things in fact, that are just better (and just as easy) in the oven.

As a bonus, here is a recipe for hot chocolate. I have not tested it, but it seems like it will be okay. Be sure to follow the directions carefully.

Click to enbiggen

Molded Chicken and Grape Salad

Sigh. People of the 70's. This is your fault. What made you people decide that encasing vegetables and meats in fruit jello was a super-de-duper idea? Shame on you.

Out of all the molded dinners, I chose this one because it sounded sort of like that yummy chicken salad on croissants you get at church dinners.

It was not.



Molded Chicken and Grape Salad
1 package (3 oz.) Jell-O brand gelatin, lemon or lime flavor
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup boiling water
1/8 teaspoon tarragon
3/4 cup cold water
2 teaspoons lemon juice
1 cup diced cooked chicken or turkey
1/4 pound green or purple grapes, halved and seeded (about 3/4 cup)
1/2 cup diced celery

Dissolve gelatin and salt in boiling water, add tarragon. Add cold water and lemon juice and chill until thickened. Stir in remaining ingredients. Spoon into 4-cup mold or individual molds. Chill until firm, about 4 hours. Unmold and serve with mayonnaise. Makes about 3 1/2 cups or 4 entree servings.



Verdict:
This is an abomination. The bits with grapes and celery were sort of fine, but the chicken was... well, it was coated in lemon Jello. What more can you say? I ate a few bites, then chucked the rest in the trash. If someone served this to me at their house, I would be able to eat it so I wouldn't offend them. I would just never, ever make this again. Or anything like it. Ever. I tried a bit with mayonnaise, as per instructions. Awful. So bad. So bad. Hubby ate all of his and said he'd had worse, but then accused me of trying to make recipes until finally he would not be able to say this. He claimed that I was doomed to failure.

Curses.

I do love my Jello mold though. It is plastic and had interchangable designs that snap onto it to fill with mayonnaise or whipped cream, for festive occasions. When you pop it off, it also breaks the seal so the Jello slides right out. So look out! Now that I'm super good at using it, we're having lime jello with green beans and pimentos and a mayo-filled Christmas tree next Christmas!

Oh, did you think I made up the green beans and pimentos bit? No.



REJECTED.

French Bean Basket
2 packages (3 oz. each) or 1 package (6 oz.) Jell-O brand gelatin, lemon flavor
2 chicken bouillon cubes
2 cups boiling water
1 package (9 oz.) Birds Eye 5 minute French style green beans
1 1/4 cups cold water
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 tablespoons chopped pimento

Dissolve gelatin and bouillon cubes in boiling water. Add frozen beans and stir until beans separate and gelatin begins to thicken. Stir in cold water, lemon juice and pimento. Pour into 4- or 5-cup ring mold or individual molds. Chill until firm, about 2 hours. Unmold and garnish with crisp greens, if desired. makes about 4 cups or 8 servings.

REJECTED.

Gazpacho Salad
1 can (7 oz.) pimientoes, drained and diced
1 1/2 cups diced unpeeled cucumber
3/4 cup diced green pepper
2 medium tomatoes, diced
4 scallions, sliced
1 cup sliced pitted ripe olives
1 small clove garlic, crushed
2 tablespoons salad oil
1/3 vinegar
1 tablespoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 can (10 1/2 oz.) consomme
2 packages (3 oz. each) Jell-O brand gelatin, lemon flavor
1 1/2 cups boiling water

Combine pimentos, vegetables, olives, garlic, oil, vinegar, salt, and pepper in large bowl. Mix well and stir in consomme. Dissolve gelatin in boiling water. Chill until thickened. Fold in vegetable mixture. Pour into 8-cup mold. Chill until firm, about 4 hours. Unmold and garnish with tomato, lemon and cucumber slices, if desired. Makes 14 servings.